Funes the Memorious, Western New York version

Description:
"Typical mid-afternoon commercial fare from WKBW TV in Buffalo, NY. 1. Shield Soap 2. Triaminic Cold Syrup 3. Ty-D-Bol 4. Lee Press On Nails (Active Length) 5. ABC Promo- Ryan's Hope"

[Circa?]

Autogyro

Dizzyhead Martin has a hilariously erudite post on those posters for gyros:

While more careful inspection reveals that this gal is specifically endorsing “Kronos,” this brand, like all Gyro brands, plays a nearly inaudible second fiddle to the “Gyro as basic foodstuff” declaration. This commercial team-up figures the Gyro as an essential food element rather than a food compound (which is what it is), effectively aligning the Gyro, despite containing a diverse array of ingredients and pre-packaged preparation, with the wholesome appeal and collaborative publicity of the raw and semi-raw materials market. Take milk, for example. Milk the food presents a unified, brandless front. A victory for milk is a victory for all milk brands. Meats have long pursued a similar strategy. Like a battalion of British redcoats, Beef (“it’s what’s for dinner”) and Pork (“the other white meat”), have honorably cast their lots together, launching a single, upright, frontal assault on the American public, whether by choice or because government subsidy mandates it. Gyros have chosen to deal in the same semi-brandless currency. The result is the feeling that one might wait in line to receive a bushel of gyros along with some toilet paper and bread.

Sure, Mulkeen, sure—but doesn't the name Kronos bear further investigation?!

The Distractions

One thing that distracted me at last night's Arcade Fire show: I finally noticed the resemblance of the Neon Bible emblem



to that of vanity publisher Author House:



(I also laughed at the thought of this comparison.)

* * *

Is "Maybe It's Maybelline" the "Is It Live or Is It Memorex?" of our time?

That was the day

In yesterday's Times, John Mellencamp agonizes about the use of one of his new songs in a Chevy commercial.

“I’m not saying it’s right. I’m not suggesting it for anybody else. This is just what I did this time to reinvent myself and stay in business. Sometimes I get sad about it really. I still don’t think that people should sell their songs for advertising.”

The day before, I was startled by a familiar accordion-like refrain issuing from my TV—a melody I attempt, every now and again, to play on my $10 toy accordion—from a favorite song of yore...what was it? And...what was this commercial for? It was The The's "This Is the Day"—in an ad for M&M's. A favorite song—ruined! Alas, if only Matt Johnson had agonized a bit more—or at least given over the rights to something I actually like, e.g., The Swiffer...

(Favorite joke on this subject: An old Zippy the Pinhead in which Griffy imagines Dylan's "You Gotta Serve Somebody" being used in a Kentucky Fried Chicken ad.)