Freudgate!

Dear Mr. Dizzies:

You may be interested to know that the surname Freud is a codename for members of a group of concerned citizens who speak out against "environmental art." They have worked tirelessly to make the public irritable about charming and sometimes even transcendent projects.

If I were you, I wouldn't have posted my intention to be at the Christo exhibit each day. These people are a violent lot and they mean business. If you feel you need a chaperone who is familiar with Freudian ways (I'd prefer not to reveal my former affiliations—let's just say, that Richard Serra and I haven't always been on the best of terms), please let me offer my services.

All the best,
Othello Crabapple